Chapter 3, page 7 - He wasn`t entirely alone

[Ceridwen]

I really like the atmosphere of this pad of Ambrosia`s (if it is his pad of course). I`d also like to live in a tree and be so comfy. I like the glowlights, they give the place a very ethereal feel while the burning candles still makes it seem cosy. And Ambrosia has the cooloest beetle-eyes ever. I really love Livy`s attentive expression in the first panel - and the look she sends Ambrosia in the last one. Winner!

It`s a great update Barbington, nevermind the lateness. It`s always worth waiting for :)

[Barb Jacobs]

"And Ambrosia has the cooloest beetle-eyes ever."

His eyes look just like my dad's. ^_^

I'm glad you like the atmosphere of the page, I was trying to go for a cozy, yet sort of uneasy atmosphere.

This chapter was really hard. It was a rewrite- I pulled out the chapter I was going to do at the last minute, so I had to scramble to create this one. Overall, I'm not sure it works. Lately Xylia has been getting some negative chatter about the writing on the web. The art is usually liked, but the writing, which I have always worried about, is starting to get panned. People don't think the story has gone anywhere, and words to describe the writing have been 'cliched' & 'corny'. "Not sure why I read this" has come up a few times too. Combined with my recent bout in the ring with 'Icky D' these comments of course mushroomed in my mind to epic proportions.

I decided I probably better not read reviews on the web. The comments here and on the comments are almost always positive, so I will stick with reading them. ^_^

Thank you Ceri for your nice comments!
~B

[lisabond]

Realize these comments are most likely coming from people who most likely can't formulate a story. It can't be "action-intrigue-romance" all the time. There has to be lulls (although I don't see them as such) so the reader can catch one's breath and wait for the next big scene. Sheesh.

And if a line wasn't "corny"(personally, I haven't seen corn in the story), then I'm sure someone would make the comment, "What in the heck did Claudius mean by that?", or "What convoluted dialogue!"

And, if someone isn't too sure why they read the panel, then why fricken bother making a comment, if just to be a troll? Funny how most people who spout negative comments are the least informed on how to tell a story. And IF the story is slowing down (because, all stories do, consider it a set-up for the next revelation), the amazing art is still there to goggle over. Sheesh, sheesh, sheesh and sheesh! Some people!

[Barb Jacobs]

Aw, thank you Lisa. That does actually make me feel better to read this. Writing is new for me, and I'm sort of learning as I go. Sometimes I stumble around looking for the lightswitch in my storytelling, and I've felt that this chapter was one of those, since it was added suddenly.

I could easily be more cryptic with dialogue, but like you said, then people would complain about that, so I just need to dump a bucket of confidence over my head and forge on.

There has been a lot of set up. But really most character driven stories are about set up. That's all it is- giving the characters something to shoot for, to be afraid of, to prove-

Clunkity clunkity!

Thank you for your support, Lisa!
~B

[Liria]

Keep in mind that how a story reads when you have to wait several days in between updates, and how it reads down the road to someone new who gets it all in one sitting are two completely different things. Your pacing may seem slower now that it actually is. That's something that all online comics have to deal with.

I've seen nothing wrong with pacing or language, myself.

[Strange Ian]

You know what I hadn't noticed before? That the furniture of the room seems to be grown out of wood! I'd get one of those chairs, but it would probably look pretty silly in an ordinary house. It's funny though, you could probably grow a room like that, I mean, look at this. The downside: You'd need like a redwood tree, a lot of patience and a lifespan of a couple of thousand years. Ah, the paradox of being human and having large-scale dreams...

What? Oh, yes, the comic...
There are just more and more things to love about Claudius, how the eyes just draws your attention to them with their cool colour, his bony and angular shoulders, the way he's holding on to Livy... Also, he's getting his scruff on!

I could rant more, but I probably shouldn't. So I'll just add that Ambrosia has the coolest beard ever, and I like his cane. And that you should just keep doing what you're doing, Barb. There will always be trolls, but you don't have to listen to them.

[Barb Jacobs]

The furniture is supposed to look grown, I'm glad you spied that. ^_^ I hope I can actually explain it in the story, but I may have to explain it directly- we shall see. I promise it didn't take a thousand years.

Claude is getting scruffy. He's been asleep for a while. ^_^

These folks that commented weren't really trolls, just making comments in different forums and sites. They weren't really cruel, just opinions. But I was sorry to read that they found Xylia unappealing in different ways. That was all I meant by that.

Thank you SI!!
~B

[Canterrain]

Personally one of my favorite parts of this page -is- the writing. Specifically Livy. Her last little dig in there is perfect. And really ringing true of her personality. I know Barb says she has trouble letting the personalities flow and finding each character's voice, but I would never know it. I can hear them all clearly in my head. And Livy's line there was exactly right for the kind of person she has shown us to be.

[Barb Jacobs]

Thank you, Josh! That always makes me feel better to hear that the characters' voices are coming across okay. The next chapter finally brings in more characters with more opportunity for interaction. I'm pretty excited about that.

Writing a bunch of scenes with frequently just one character has been really challenging. I don't know that I did Claude justice. He's been called 'stupid' several times, which tells me that folks didn't really understand his dilemma. That's not the readers' fault, it's mine. His reactions and writing didn't really convey what I was trying to. Going forward, I hope to improve upon that. But at this point it's water under the bridge.

~B

[Joseph Volpendesta]

Barb,for whatever it's worth, I have done some writing and have been published. However I've never been able to break into fiction (short stories). However writing short stories for profit is enormously competitive. From what I've seen, you're doing fine,although I still think that a certain publisher wouldn't know agood story if it hit him in the....uh, Barb, you're doing great.